[arg_discuss] [pm] Commercial vs. Grassroots, Player or PM?

[D. Cook]

Brooke wrote:
>And, honestly, I'd be curious to
>know peoples motivations for creating games, even if it is for prestige :)


I've been pondering the many discussion threads on the mailing list 
all day.  I think this question is the easiest for me to answer.

Why do kids in high school and college act in plays when there's no 
monetary gain to be had?  For the love of doing it.  I adored 
becoming someone else for a while, the camaraderie with my fellow 
actors, and bringing life to text.  You function with your fellow 
actors like a well-oiled machine after a while, and I take enormous 
satisfaction in collaboratively bringing entertainment to others.

In fact, one of the college courses I took (Interpretation of 
Literature through Drama) had an improv warm-up where the class would 
become a machine.  One person would take the stage and perform a 
motion and sound.  One by one others joined in, each doing their own 
motions and sounds but the sum of the whole performance was greater 
than the individual parts.  It was great fun and always different.

When my friends would come to my performances, I loved hearing their 
views from it afterwards but grew immediately uncomfortable if they 
started looking at me, Dee, in a different light.  I would not make a 
good movie star.  I don't mind accepting praise for my performance, 
but I'm still the same ol' me I was before it happened.  I feel the 
same way about being a PM.  I love talking about games and meta 
issues or answering questions about what I've done, but when people 
start treating me like a larger-than-life special person because I've 
worked on games, I grow uncomfortable.  I am always taken a bit aback 
and definitely honored when someone asks me to work on their game or 
consult with them.

I like to make games because it's fun.  It's rewarding to see people 
enjoy something I've created.  Those player-head-asplode moments are 
just incredible.  The work  is varied from figuring out logistics to 
creating characters.  It's like being both an actress and a director; 
a star, but in a next-door-neighbor way rather than a 90210 one.  It 
challenges both my planning skills and my improvisational ones.  I've 
never really gotten the "I'm an artist and that's why I make my art" 
thing, but if this is what being an artist is - doing something 
because it makes you joyful - then I do it for the art.

As for feedback...  Players are more likely to be honest about their 
likes and dislikes because ARG designers are cloaked, so feedback is 
clear and usually immediate rather than held back from a fear of 
hurting feelings.  The anonymity of the Net is often decried because 
people say things they wouldn't in real life, but I think it works to 
a game designer's advantage because what they're hearing is usually 
quite honest.

Parenthetically funny, even though I've been a PM or BTS on 6 games 
or more, I still feel like a kid in Mommy's shoes when I post to this 
list.  While Unfiction may intimidate some players, some of _your_ 
credentials and post-name initials intimidate _me_.
-- 
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.